my imaginary schedule

07.00 : wake up

07.15 - 08.15 : jogging

08.15 - 08.30 : take a bath & prepare for work

09.00 : arrive in office, have breakfast and start working diligently

13.00 : eat fruits and have lunch

18.00 : go back home

18.45 - 19.00 : sweep the room

19.00 : have dinner

20.00 : take a bath

20.30 : learn japanese

21.00 : drawing daily comics/illustration

22.00 : read online newspaper

23.00 : watching an episode of japanese drama

24.00 : brush teeth and read a novel in bed while preparing to sleep

00.30 : sleep

-----------------

*sigh* I wish one day, it's not merely an imagination anymore. too many things to do, too little time.

------------------

[22.00 PM and stuck on TV and facebook]

10 Things I Wish I'd Do Daily.

1. Get up early.

2. Go jogging for 30 minutes.

3. Work on daily manga & other personal artwork project.

4. Learn Japanese.

5. Do laundry.

6. Watch at least 1 episode of any Japanese anime/dorama & read at least 1 chapter of Japanese manga.

7. Blogging.

8. Read online newspaper.

9. Drink hi-calcium milk.

10. Sleep no later than 12 midnite.




[1.49] see, ever right this second I've failed no 10! >_<

where have all the flowers gone?

Ah finally a time to write again! :D

Well, first things first. Not much have been happening lately. Life is decent. There were some minor problems along the way tho but nothing serious basically.

But anyway, I started to feel that slowly but sure, I am running out of control of everything. I have no idea what made me feel this way. But this thinking has been bugging me a lot up to the point that I am worried about what will my life be in the next 20 years?

There are some relationship problems. Well, nothing so serious, but only some minors. But still, it's these little things that bothers me a lot. Like, sometimes this thinking popped up in my mind whenever we got into a quarrel lately: why we can even quarrel over this small stuff when we have already been through the same situation before where we didn't even give a damn about? Sheesh.

I really don't understand. But this I do realise: I have changed. People change. When people change, so does the way they see things.

To sum it up, here's the ugly truth: I become more of an emotional person now, I'm afraid.

Helplessly, now I am becoming more and more, a kind of girlfriend I didn't want myself to be.

Sometimes these days, I wondered why my thick layer of patience is rapidly wearing thin like the dying ozone layer.

Sometimes these days, I ask myself-

Where has this girl I once before gone? The girl with more patience, more understanding, more kindness in her.

I am left confused and clueless. Unsatisfied. Sad and angry.

Angry of what I have become now. Sad of remembering the good old me and the good old days.

I don't even know whether I am being truthful to myself when I write this, or am I just overreacting.

Well, whatever it is, I am a little unwell right now. I am losing my old self. And this new self is not something better, really. I can only pray, that I could work things out slowly, one by one.

Maybe like my boyfriend once said, it's all just a game of mind.

I guess he's right. Dead on.




[17.13 PM] sometimes, i just need your hug and nothing more.







photo from flickr by ainasa: http://www.flickr.com/photos/23179744@N03/3465745433/

a missing chunk of yesterday.

My hubby is sick today. He's got a terrible runny nose. And a persistent headache. And sore eyes.

Symptoms of a flu.

Plus he got a scratch on his fingers. Not so serious but he got a chunk of skin missing D8

But the best i can do for him was only to put a plaster on his fingers, and hand him a strip of runny nose medicine.

And that's about all.

When I finished my dinner and we have to go back to our own house

I so wished things were the way it was before.

I wish we could go home together somewhere

And when we got home, I'll be telling him to wash his feet, and just rest in bed.

I will pile pillows and adjust them, until it is just perfect for him

to watch movie comfortably while getting some rest

I wish I were there, to open the blanket and cover him up with it.

I wish I could watch movie at home with him

I don't care about what we'll be watching

Cheap comedy, cheesy romance, teen movie, boring movie-

it all doesn't matter to me

Being by your side

Being able to hug you

Being able to take care of you

Is all that matters.

I'll hand you tissues when you sneeze,

I'll give you water to drink, every fifteen minutes

I'll ask whether you're feeling better after taking your medicine

I'll put my hand on your forehead, to check whether you're having fever

I'll tuck you in bed when the movie's over.

I'll hug you. I'll kiss you.

I wish I could.

I wish it's yesterday once more.




[23.30] wishing i was there.